Right so the whole thing is a billiard game but the table has these spinning discs, two of them, and the balls are moving around like little drunk planets while you try to sink them. And there's a woman, blonde, also spinning. Not on the table exactly but. You know. She's there. Doing a strip thing. The physics are completely wrong and that's almost the point, like the cue ball will just decide to take a holiday mid shot and you're sitting there adjusting your angle by one pixel and then the disc rotates and suddenly your perfect shot is now aimed directly at absolutely nothing.

The model they used, it's a real person I think? Or a very good fake, but she's got that look like she's about to ask you if you've tried turning it off and on again. Very specific energy. The stripping is tied to the billiards somehow, you sink balls she removes things. Standard. But the spinning never stops. Ever. I watched for maybe five minutes just to see if there's a pattern and there isn't, it's like the developer just set rotation speed to "whatever" and went to lunch. The balls will sometimes clip through the pockets too which is. A choice. I wish they'd leaned harder into the absurdity of it, like give her a spinning background of her own, really commit to the bit.

Was playing on my phone during a boring zoom call and the audio is just generic casino sounds mixed with this breathy moaning that kicks in whenever you pocket something. Had to frantically mute when my boss asked me a question. The whole experience feels like someone described pool to an alien and the alien was like "yes and the woman is also a planet". Speaking of planets, mercury is in retrograde right now which probably explains why I spent twenty minutes trying to sink the 8 ball and it kept - wait no that's not. Whatever. The white ball physics are a hate crime against newton. It'll stop dead on a straight shot then rocket off at 45 degrees when you tap it gently. Makes the stripping feel earned honestly.