Looking back, it's almost funny how a simple condom changes everything. There's this guy, right? Just a perverted man who can't sleep, dick harder than trigonometry. The whole game is him grabbing a pack of rubbers and hitting the streets at night, hunting for some nice pussy. And the city is packed with big tits, hentai babes everywhere like it's some kind of titty parade. You'd think it's easy. It's not.

Movement is arrow keys, space bar to do the deed. But the moment you step outside his house, almost every sexy babe screams and runs. They treat you like a maniac. Which, I mean, fair. Running around with a condom and a boner isn't exactly charming behavior. The real twist is the policemen and mad dogs. They mess you up bad. I got arrested like six times trying to figure out why some woman with massive knockers suddenly turned into a roadblock because some dog started chasing me while a cop spawned from nowhere. Sometimes I just let the dog catch me. It's faster. There's this weird arcade rhythm where you're dodging threats to get to the action. The humor's dark, real stupid stuff. Like the guy's face. That permanent pervert grin. You'll laugh at how janky it is, the whole thing screaming cheap 2000s flash game energy. Not polished at all.

During a session I actually became a therapist in my head. Analyzing this man's desires. What drives a pixelated deviant to endlessly chase terrified women while avoiding law enforcement and angry dogs? Is it lust or just insomnia? The game doesn't care. It just wants you to find the next babe who won't run, press space, and see the badly drawn sex scene that follows. One moment I'm cursing the controls, next I'm cackling because a dog yeeted me across the screen. It's about chasing a nut while the whole world tries to stop you. A pure giggle-fest with boners.

Think you can get him laid without catching a baton to the skull?