ok so the whole point of these Porn Bastards things is customization right? like thats their whole deal. you get the frozen setup, whatever, elsa in her ice palace or some shit. i spent maybe 40 minutes just in the options menu. not even kidding. you can tweak her tits individually which is both insane and exactly what i want from these games. made one slightly bigger than the other because perfection is boring. the blonde hair has like 12 shades and i picked the most obnoxious platinum one that practically glows.

the actual sex part is just clicking buttons. speed up slow down next position. the cumshot options are decent i guess, you can pick where it lands which is more control than most games give you. but heres the thing. i customized her so much that when the animation started i was like wait thats not my elsa. the face resets or something? i couldnt figure out how to save the face settings properly and the game doesnt tell you shit. maybe its a bug maybe im stupid. probably both.

the story text is whatever, i clicked through it immediately. something about her powers and being lonely, the usual frozen parody nonsense. the animation loops are smooth enough but the sounds are from like a 2005 flash game and they loop badly. youll hear the same moan three times in a row and it takes you right out.

for a custom game theres no custom positions which feels like a missed shot. you get what they give you and you just control the tempo. the princess outfit toggle is there in options but it barely changes anything visually, just adds or removes a cape basically. i wanted more frozen themed stuff, ice powers, the whole deal. instead its just blonde big tits girl in a blue dress approximation. which is fine if thats all you need. the loading between scenes is weirdly long for a browser game too, just a black screen for like 6 seconds while my wifi cries.