Argleton. Right. So it’s this weird little bubble city, disconnected from everything, and you’re just some guy. A male protagonist, obviously. The whole point is to wander around, poke at things, and see which of the quirky inhabitants will let you, uh, get to know them. It’s a point and click sandbox, so you’re just clicking on girls until something happens. First one I properly cornered was this milf who runs a shop. One minute I’m buying a soda, the next she’s got her big tits out and is giving me a handjob over the counter like she’s stamping a loyalty card. The animation is that specific 3DCG style where everyone looks a bit like a posable doll, but honestly, the sheer deadpan delivery of the sex is what got me. No romance, just immediate, clinical groping.

Then the tone just shatters. I find a girl cosplaying as Chun Li, right? And I’m thinking, okay, footjob. Classic. But no. The game suddenly remembers it has a “transformation” tag and she goes full Naruto sexy jutsu into a copy of Rogue from the X-Men. Don’t ask. I don’t know. I was too busy watching the male domination route unlock where you basically spank her while she’s stuck mid-transformation, ahegao face and all. It’s like the dev forgot what franchise they were ripping off mid-scene. There’s a dating sim skeleton buried under all the anal sex and exhibitionism, but the humor is so unintentional. You’ll be in a “romance” scene with a virgin, and the next dialogue option is just “titfuck?” with no buildup. I respect the directness.

The drugs mechanic is pointless. You take them, the screen wobbles, and you get a harem scene with Kitana and some lesbian OCs. That’s it. My save got stuck on a loop where a girl kept teasing me with a sex toy but the POV camera was clipping inside her big ass so I couldn’t see the creampie finale. 10/10. No idea what Argleton’s actual story is. Something about being disconnected from the world. Who cares. I was too busy watching a group sex scene where someone’s spanking animation just kept going for a solid minute after the dialogue ended. The sound design is just wet slaps and silence. Perfect.