ok so the whole point of these Porn Bastards things is customization right? like thats their whole deal. you get the frozen setup, whatever, elsa in her ice palace or some shit. i spent maybe 40 minutes just in the options menu. not even kidding. you can tweak her tits individually which is both insane and exactly what i want from these games. made one slightly bigger than the other because perfection is boring. the blonde hair has like 12 shades and i picked the most obnoxious platinum one that practically glows.

the actual sex part is just clicking buttons. speed up slow down next position. the cumshot options are decent i guess, you can pick where it lands which is more control than most games give you. but heres the thing. i customized her so much that when the animation started i was like wait thats not my elsa. the face resets or something? i couldnt figure out how to save the face settings properly and the game doesnt tell you shit. maybe its a bug maybe im stupid. probably both.

the story text is whatever, i clicked through it immediately. something about her powers and being lonely, the usual frozen parody nonsense. the animation loops are smooth enough but the sounds are from like a 2005 flash game and they loop badly. youll hear the same moan three times in a row and it takes you right out.

for a custom game theres no custom positions which feels like a missed shot. you get what they give you and you just control the tempo. the princess outfit toggle is there in options but it barely changes anything visually, just adds or removes a cape basically. i wanted more frozen themed stuff, ice powers, the whole deal. instead its just blonde big tits girl in a blue dress approximation. which is fine if thats all you need. the loading between scenes is weirdly long for a browser game too, just a black screen for like 6 seconds while my wifi cries.

The whole mana system is backwards and I love it. You're a wizard guy in some neon alley, and to get spell juice you gotta cop a feel. Not even joking. Touch her tits, mana goes up. But then the glass fogs over, whatever that means, and you have to rub her pussy to calm her down. It's like balancing a budget where the currency is horny.

I spent way too long on the finger stuff because I kept losing control when she came. The game warns you, "Making her come nets a lot of mana but loses a lot of control." So you're sitting there, hand on mouse, trying not to let the bar fill up while she's moaning. There's a hand tool you can buy, which sounds helpful until you realize it's just another way to touch her. The customization is decent, you can tweak her look, but the real customization is how much self restraint you have.

The domination tag is there but it's weird. You're not really dominating anyone, you're just... managing a wet situation. The outdoor night city backdrop is nice, neon reflections on skin, but the magic system feels like an excuse to keep your hands busy. I wish there was more actual wizard shit, like casting spells or whatever. There won't be. It's a loop: touch, calm, come, repeat. The hentai sex scene is fine, nothing groundbreaking, but the slow control loss upgrade is basically mandatory if you don't want to blow your load in two minutes.

One thing that bugged me: why does the glass fog up? Is it a window? A mirror? I never figured it out and it kept happening. Anyway, if you like games where the main mechanic is edging, this is that.

Right, so Make Me Yours. I loaded it up expecting, I dunno, some kind of game loop maybe? There isn't one. It's a character designer, pure and simple, and the first thing that hits you is how barebones the UI is. Like, deliberately unpolished, almost a sketchpad vibe. You get a base body, a bunch of sliders that don't always do what you think, and a clothing list that's half "sexy maid" and half "what if a fantasy armor exploded." The localization is a trip too, some buttons say things like "Equip Cloth" and "Eye Sparkle Level" which honestly adds to the charm. I spent twenty minutes just trying to get the nipple color to match the areola shape I wanted, a very specific complaint I know, but the hue slider jumps from "zombie purple" to "traffic cone orange" with nothing in between. That won't be fixed, I can tell.

The real meat here is for erotic roleplay and OC creation, and on that front it's weirdly effective. There's no animation, no story, just a static doll you can dress up and then... screenshot? The hentai tag is doing a lot of heavy lifting, it's more like a digital lewd paper doll. I made this one character, a tired looking elf with massive tits and a single pauldron, and the fact that her expression was permanently set to "mildly annoyed" while wearing a micro-bikini made me laugh out loud. You can't change the face much beyond a few presets, which is a shame. Wanted to give her a smug grin, got "disappointed librarian" instead. The customisation depth is in the body sliders, you can make some truly absurd proportions, the kind that would make a physcis textbook cry. Then you slap a "tentacle" themed accessory on her head because that's an option for some reason, and suddenly you've got a backstory forming in your head. That's the roleplay part kicking in, I guess.

Don't go in expecting a game. It's a tool, a janky, horny little tool that runs in a browser. I wish there was a way to save poses, or even just a randomize button for when you want to see what cursed combinations the engine spits out. The "custom" and "avatar" tags are the whole deal. You're building a reference image for a smutty D&D campaign or a very specific fantasy in your notes app. The lack of polish is almost the point, it feels like someone's private project they just threw online. If you treat it like a very advanced, slightly broken dress-up flash game from the old internet, you'll get the most out of every spicy moment. Just accept that the "remove all" button sometimes leaves the stockings on. A feature, not a bug? Maybe.