This game has that energy of finding a weird Flash file from 2006 on a hard drive. You know the type. It loads instantly, the background is just a gradient, and the model they used looks like she got lost on the way to a glamour shoot. Her dress is this cheap satin thing that catches the light wrong, like a bad curtain. I actually loved it for that. It's so confidently ugly it circles back to being authentic. But then the shooting starts and I want to scream.

You have this cannon thing, right. The puzzle is shooting colored blocks into matching slots. The logic part is figuring out the angles. The shooter part is the projectile. It's all very straightforward until you miss by a pixel and the block bounces back. The sound effect is just a wet plink. No haptic feedback on my phone obviously but my brain supplied the disappointment. The game rewards you with a striptease. One piece of clothing falls off per solved puzzle. The first reward, a glove hitting the floor, felt less like a victory and more like the game was doing me a favor. The model just stands there with a blank stare the whole time, which is honestly more disturbing than if she looked into the camera.

Wish the difficulty curve wasn't shaped like a brick wall. Level three is fine. Level four is fine. Level five requires you to bend physics in a way that suggests the developer forgot to test it. I sat there bouncing a yellow cube off three walls for a solid minute while a real model patiently waited in her underwear. Who designs this pacing? A lesbian arcade striptease puzzle should not make me feel like I'm filing my taxes. The logic of the later puzzles gets genuinely clever, but the reward model's dead eyed expression never changes. It's a mood, I guess. A specific one.

The "lesbian" tag is misleading. There's only one woman. Unless she's having a moment with the physics engine. The strip sequence glitched once and her shoe stayed on. Floating. I respected that.