holy shit this is the most cursed thing ive ever clicked on and i cant stop playing it

the ship crashes right and suddenly youre running through this alien planet and EVERYTHING wants to get in your pants. like literally everything. the tentacles dont even pretend to be subtle they just go straight for it. wasd to run space to smack them away and shift for aiming mode which i didnt figure out until way too late because who reads instructions. the customization thing is weird too you can change how your character looks but honestly youre gonna see them in compromising positions so much it barely matters what outfit theyre wearing. its like dressing up for a disaster you know is coming.

the combat feels janky on purpose i think. like a flash game from 2009 that someone left in a basement for ten years and it came back wrong. you mash space and sometimes it connects and sometimes a tentacle just ignores your attack entirely and then the animation plays and youre like WELL GUESS THATS HAPPENING NOW. the parody angle is there i guess with the whole alien abduction setup but honestly it stops being funny after the third time a green thing with too many appendages corners you against a wall. the platforming sections are actually kinda fun in a broken way like trying to jump gaps while dodging grabby vines and theres this one part with floating platforms that kept killing me because the hitboxes are absolute lies.

i unironically love how the enemies just swarm you if you stand still for two seconds. no chill whatsoever. the bit em up tag makes sense because you can fight back but also sometimes you just get overwhelmed and thats apparently the point. forgot to mention the sound design is basically nonexistent just some squelchy noises and a looping track that drills into your brain. the pixel art is crude but the animations are way more detailed than they need to be for a game like this. like someone really spent time making sure the tentacle physics looked right and i respect that in a deeply uncomfortable way.