Right, so Diva Mizuki’s promo tour. Baka’s the producer now, which, if you’ve played any of the other games, you know that’s basically putting a chihuahua in charge of a steak buffet. The whole setup is this weird, horny visual novel but then it slaps you with a minigame that’s just... aggressively lewd. You’re in the back of the tour bus and you’ve got this janky, almost puzzle-like interface where you’re aiming, I guess, her tits? To catch the cumshots. The physics are deliberately off, like a flash game from 2006 that someone spilled lube on. The shots arc weird and her sprite just kind of wobbles there with this perpetually unimpressed anime face.

That face. Diva’s expression barely changes whether she’s getting glazed or listening to Baka’s latest moronic production idea. And honestly? That’s the funniest part. The humor tag isn’t from witty dialogue, it’s from the sheer deadpan absurdity of the jiggle mechanics. Her boobs have their own gravitational pull, I swear. You’ll miss a shot because you’re staring at the bizarre, hypnotic bounce pattern, not because you’re bad at the game. Which I am. The hitbox is a suggestion at best.

Wish the bus tour actually meant different backgrounds scrolling by. It’s just a static shot of a bus interior that feels more like a storage closet. I spent too long trying to figure out if the little window on the left was a window or a poster. It’s a poster. Anyway, the whole thing is basically a cumshot catcher with a diva who’s too famous for this shit and her boyfriend who definitely peaked in this fictional universe. If they added a DLC where Diva just roasts you for missing, that would be the real endgame.